All memes in this post were found on Pinterest
As of last week, I have been doing a lot of cleaning, spring cleaning in the winter I guess, because I am really feeling the need to live a much more simple life. I have hit the 6 month anniversary of being told I had No Evidence of Disease, and as grateful as I am, I am also feeling a lot of other things. One of them is that I really need a change. I figured cleaning is a good way to start making some change, that is until I can figure out where else I need changes in my life.
I have a terrible habit of accumulating too much stuff and never wanting to throw it away. I assume it has to do with my childhood. With 3 sibling,s it was hard to have all the clothes, shoes, and beauty products I wanted. So now I think I hold on to them just because I am scared I will never be able to get them again. Of course, that is just me playing self-psychiatrist. I do this a lot. It's much cheaper and I tend to like the opinion a lot more.
I also think I have a tad bit of a hoarding tendency. Nothing TOO dramatic. I just feel the need to always have information and have things handy, so that means I keep lots of books, printed articles,beauty products, and craft supplies. Thank God for Pinterest! I can store ALL the junk I want and never have to see it lying around the house or have to hear Mr. LSM say, "So WHERE are you going to put THAT?" every time I pin something.
I am also thankful they don't have a show for Pinterest Hoarders., I would be on there. I would be the worst.
The show would go something like this:
"Mrs. LSM, do you really have 75 recipes for salted caramel mocha cupcakes and never once looked at one of the recipes to make one?"
"Yes... Yes, I do. What if I lose one accidentally? What if the link is gone the day I decide to make some? What if i am stuck in the house with no car and no food and my children haven't eaten in 3 days and the only thing I have the EXACT ingredients to make are from recipe #52, but you thought I only needed one recipe? Do you want us to starve? Huh? Well, do you?"
Well, that may be a bit much, but you get where I am going with this. Let's hope this never becomes a reality show.
So, yesterday I was cleaning out my much dreaded bathroom drawer (where I throw EVERYTHING since my kids barely give me enough time to tinkle, much less primp and then properly put away all my tools) and my make up drawer. Here is what I found:
This is a collection of sunscreen. I stopped using these brands after being diagnosed and doing more research on what SHOULD be in my sunscreen. That's a completely different post in the making.
I kept sunscreen EVERYWHERE. For years before my melanoma diagnosis, I was seriously bothered to walk outside without sunscreen ON MY FACE. The rest of my body, not so much. I was adamant about putting it on before I walked outside, but I thought reapplying was only necessary if I were laying out. Once a day is not enough.
Then I found this:
It's a bit of a blurry picture, but it's my stash of self tanner. I even had a self tanner booster, there on the right. I found it a tad bit tough to get rid of all of this knowing how much money I spent on a few of these. I had to tell myself that even if I did want to use self tanner again, these are anywhere from 9 months to 5 years old, so they wouldn't do me any good.
And then, while shopping today, I paused briefly, when I saw a new brand of air brush tan. It took a few seconds, but I got back to my new self and moved on. Old habits die hard, I guess. And, as I have been telling myself about a lot of things lately, it's always toughest in the beginning.
I guess the REAL trick to change is to do some cleaning out of my mind. That is officially the place where I hoard the most junk!!! Don't we all? Time to officially let go of old beliefs; ones that no longer work for me or the ones that were never really true in the first place.
A spring cleaning of the mind, that's what I need. Right after I clean my house, of course. I doubt I can get away with telling Mr. LSM that the house is a wreck because I've been too busy cleaning out my mind. Wait? Do you think that would work?
~This would be me, only cross out ice cream and add coffee~
Even though cleaning my mind would involve no physical items to sort through, it still seems SO much tougher than just cleaning out the shoes in my closet. Ok, maybe not the shoes. But everything else.
I hope to feel VERY comfortable in my natural skin tone soon. I am already getting used to it, and surprisingly, I prefer my face to be lighter than with too much color. I am beginning to like the nice contrast of my dark hair and light skin, so I am well on my way. But I still have a lot of cleaning to do, especially in my mind.
I'd love to hear your thoughts/suggestions on how you let go of the old beliefs and thoughts that don't serve you anymore (or were never good for you in the first place).
As usual, thank you for reading. Until next time, practice safe sun.